Laments from 5th grade

January 18, Thursday
Today was the beginning of the end of my week and my REAL introduction to the culture of 5th grade. When I came into the classroom today, it turns out that Mrs. G had received the lovely gift of intestinal virus from one of her dear students previously this week. She was determined to make it through the first half of the day, having her first evaluation from the principal that morning. She literally was doubled over in her chair in front of the overhead. I knew this was going to be a pretty crummy day for her, and it turned out to be pretty interesting for me too.
Because of the evaluation, I had scheduled myself to go hang out in Mrs. J's kindergarted classroom. Early last week I saw her students in the hall and was struck with their amazingly obedient behavior and adorableness, so I asked if I could visit! Her classroom is amazing. I am learning that you can almost tell a great teacher from an average teacher by what they are able to scam for their classroom. It's a level-of-care thing, I think. This particular teacher had the school computers, plus 4 of her very own computers and 5 more making a total of 14 computers in her classroom. She also had a projector and a free-standing Smart Board, all for kindergarten! When I arrived, the students were very polite and well-behaved, giving me a smile or a wave while continuing on with learning the letter “H”. I think that the most striking moment in the classroom was when she turned to one of a pair of twins and began a fluid stream of steady Spanish! Apparently, the twin students had just moved from the Dominican Republic and were just learning English. It was so encouraging to see a teacher who fostered their acquisition of academic language in American schools while making sure they understood concepts and directions in their native language. What an amazing teacher, and what adorable students!
After my venture into the kindergarten wing, I returned to find a substitute in the 5th grade room. Here is where my observation of life as a substitute teacher in 5th grade begins.
The first substitute was only there for an hour, but in that time she managed to make a fool of herself and embarrass me (as an adult) with her behavior. Now, this account is in no way to say that I am perfect or know how to behave, it is just an observation of how the students took a certain cultural affront. The teacher, in an attempt to somehow “connect” with one of our African American girls, began to speak in some sort of pop-culture rendition of Ebonics...or something. It was appalling. The substitute had no idea that she was being offensive, but the student was offended to a point where she had to go and put her head down. The teacher didn't notice. I was very glad when she left the room finally.
Ms. Graves came back from her meeting and we urged her to go home. If I would have known what 5th-grade-angst-onslaught was to come, I may have thought better of that. The next substitute was a nice girl, around my age. However, the minute she came in, she started into a story about how her mother was dying of liver cirrhosis. I tried to deflect the uncomfortable conversation and shifted instead to the plans: read-aloud, spelling, and then science.
When the students came back from lunch, they all seemed a little bit down, but I started into the read-aloud because usually it is a calming time for them. The lights were off, students were working quietly or napping. The feel in the room was not quite right. To make a long story short, when the lights came on again and behavior problems increased, I addressed the elephant in the room: the lunch duties had “wrongfully” taken away their lunch recess. If you have ever tried to get any real information out of a 5th grader, it would make sense to stop at knowing what the problem was. I soon learned that even if you let students speak, reassure them that the problem is over, it is NOT over. They would not let it go and move on with the lesson.
I have learned that the amount of drama that passes in a normal day of 5th grade is amazing. Having spoken with Tami a 5th grade teacher and also my roommate, it has become apparent that there is something developmentally at this age that prevents students from bouncing back from crises easily. A small argument, a slight look, can turn the student into a bawling mass of child for the school day. It was expected, and almost unavoidable, for a group of wronged students to sit in class and glower for the rest of the afternoon. Instead of having that, we took them out for a 20 minute secret recess.
When they came back, I had a great afternoon of science, even though the teacher was not there and the fact that the substitute was crazy and a little bit depressed. She just sat in the corner the whole time staring off in to space. It was definitely a learning experience.

January 19, Friday

Today happened in two phases, and I will not taint the first phase with the second. Finally, I will attempt to metalevel the experiences for the day.

Phase 1:
Today the students have another substitute. He is a middle aged man, possibly African American or something, and a writer. He arrived after the bell had rung. By this time, I had not gotten word if I was to have a substitute at all. In the state of Alaska, substitute teachers need not have a teaching certificate or even any degree at all. Muldoon has a reputation in the community to be a rough school (which it is absolutely not!) and consequently does not attract the most qualified of substitutes. While I could go on and on about the eccentricities of this particular man, I will refrain and keep those stories to lament to my mother about.
I don't yet understand 5th graders. Some are infuriating constantly, others great all of the time, some cry, some yell, some ebb and flow with the tide. Some have no resources but are smarter than everyone in the class. Some have no family but still care about others. What is bigger is the fact that this particular breed of student is unpredictable in all ways except one: all hell will break loose any time after lunch.
The morning went great. The lesson plans that were left came via fax and I coached the substitute through them, finding the books and worksheets needed, writing up the agenda, telling him when to take the students to library, gym and music. I had the privileged of using part of the morning to coach my reading group, the “Weasels” or “my weaselly readers” in the reading of their book Sounder. These particular students have the unique ability to work independently. They are the gifted students. Mrs. Graves is attempting to rescue them from boredom, in order to save them from an academic life of not caring.
I found new Sudoku coach-puzzles for some of my little puzzle wizards. The unlikely group consists of Caroline, Frank and Cody. These are students who normally do not make a real attempt to succeed. They attacked the puzzles with joy and earnest concentration. My prized Caroline approached me before lunchtime to show me her first correct finished Sudoku puzzle. She may be my muse.
After lunch, I was hoping for a day altogether different from the previous. I got it, but not in the way that I expected! I decided to take over the math lesson, since I had been there all week to learn this radical new framework for long division.
The following story warms my heart and reminds me that in my heart, I am mostly a teacher.
I began the lesson using the partial quotient model for long division with a twist. They have seen the framework and have worked with Mrs. G on it for two days now, but have not really soaked it in. Today, I looked at it as a free day to help these students practice their skills. I started going over problems, but allowing students to work in groups instead of at their seats independently. They still followed teacher-directed operations, but could guide each other quietly if confused. I couldn't believe it- as I continued to do problems on the overhead, students who normally did not speak in math class were comprehending the process and getting the right answer. This made my day completely worth it. Some of the quietest and lowest math achievers began to jump out of their seats (literally) with the answers. Mor, my sweet little spaz, was elated when she finally got it. I guided these students to reach out and grasp what they had been taught the past couple of days, and to taste the delectable taste of success.
I truly believe that leading students to a place where they can succeed is the first step into challenging them academically. Students who always struggle begin to believe that they will always struggle. The math story inspires me as a teacher because I was never able to do long division in the 5th grade, or after. I shared this story with Mrs. Grave's 5th grade class before I started math, and I really do think that it opened up some of the struggling students to give it one REAL try. I am so proud of myself and for these students for our work today.

Phase 2:
After math, I decided to turn the reins back over to Mr. H, the substitute, to finish out the time before science. I figured that it was after lunch, the kids had been great, and we hadn't had an after-lunch blowout, so it was bound to not happen, right? Wrong. They were completely turned off by him, and he hit a brick wall. So I decided to break right in to science until the end of school for the day, since they love science.
Science was going great, and then we had a fire drill. At that point, the students were working in groups and the substitute seized the opportunity to take charge of the class in an emergency (we didn't know it was a drill) by running to the door. Right after that, he ran out of the door before all of the students. As a result, all of the kids ran out of the door. It was pandemonium. Since I am not their teacher, nor a teacher in that school at all, I simply found the room key and locked the door and stood with the aides and office staff outside.
I found out later that the emergency plans are the same for every school (minus knowing which exit to go out of) in the Anchorage School District. All substitutes are required to know the emergency plan for the buildings they work in, and running out of the door before the students and letting them run out in a mass is not part of the plan. However, like I said before, this substitute was an exceptional character.
After the drill was over and the students had to walk in 3 feet of snow in their school shoes, I had them line up in front of me before they entered the building. When they were lined up, I walked into the building with the student behind me in a line. When I stopped and looked back, several of the students were jokingly sliding around on the slippery snowy linoleum and pushing each other all over the place. The rest where laughing or talking loudly. It was (again) pandemonium. The substitute was at the back doing nothing.
When the students came in, it became apparent to me again that this particular age group has a real difficulty “coming down” from a crisis or event. Today I was a little bit wiser and allowed them time to relax. Unfortunately to children, this looks like punishment, because I turned the lights off and had them put their heads down. While they rested, I let them know what the procedures are for emergency drills at school. Since they have had drills in the past, I expressed the inappropriateness of their behavior during the drill.
Our last 10 minutes of the day was very glum. Some students had wet socks and shoes and needed to call parents, others were just feeling crummy for not getting away with what they did. I think that I was the person who felt the worst of all, however. Since I am a high school teacher, I don't usually have to deal with mass disobedience. Usually, it is just one or two students acting out, and for the most part the rest are reasonable. I felt that to let them “get away” with things would make them loose all respect and regard for me. Above all, I care about these students and want them to grow into healthy (alive) individuals. Part of this is knowing how to behave in grave situations such as emergency drills.
Why is it, then, that I went home with such a crummy outlook on the day? I have not yet had the joy and struggle of being a parent, but I have heard that being a parent is very difficult, especially when it comes to discipline. Nobody likes to get kids into trouble, let alone other teacher's students!